Can we always learn from our mistakes?
It is said that we can all learn from our mistakes, but what is a mistake and is it from all the mistakes we can learn?
In one way I have done so many mistakes, and in another way, I have not done many mistakes.
The many mistakes I have done were based on bad assumptions, lack of experience, or ignorance. Today I would have acted differently, but at the time I acted as I could do best based on my experience, maturity, and knowledge.
At the time I was certain, that I understood things clearly and that my perspective was correct. Today I know better, and I do not want to have lived without acting based on what my level of maturity let me do.
And then again, there are the mistakes I regret and would love to correct. Today I can see they were almost all based on a lack of integrity from my side. I should have said no to relationships, I should have set boundaries with employees, I should have been more transparent with my parents, and I should have spent more time with my son.
My mistakes were all based on my not stepping up and taking the consequences of my essential personal values. I did not trust myself and I have been dishonest towards me.
And now… how can I learn from my mistakes?
I can look for a pattern, and for me, the pattern was not being honest about my values and taking the consequences of these values. When I find a pattern, then the task is to build awareness around that specific pattern to make sure, that I can catch myself in situations, when this pattern is active.
If I can identify the pattern, accept that it exists, see when it is active, and then react in the moment or close to the moment, then there is learning from the mistakes.
Observing our patterns neutrally is one path to learning. That being from our mistakes or our successes. After observing, there is the acceptance, and then comes the actual learning. But it all starts with neutrally observing.
Your weekly question
This week’s question is about the nature of mistakes and the possibility of learning from our mistakes:
- What is a mistake to you? When do you regard an action a mistake, and when is it not?
- What is the nature of your mistakes? Is it lack of courage, not taking consequences, shame or ?
- What is it you mostly have to accept about your mistakes?
Your weekly quote
It is not about IF you are making mistakes,
but about your level of awareness
and how you engage in what at first seems like a mistake.
Your weekly recommended reading